Spying diary, July 30th, 2014
This week has been slightly more eventful.
Yesterday, I finally got around to getting an anti-spying petition up and running. Which is good. The downside is that the strain of doing so pushed my mind into an ugly place. I don’t exactly know what’s wrong, but somehow if my ‘inner battery’ runs out of power, things get pretty rough psychologically. And doing something like trying to word an important petition, that I hope will be seen by lots of people, is the kind of thing that tends to drain the power quite quickly.
This last day or two, I’ve been wondering about a fellow reesident, and whether she is Shehrbano in disguise. You may say that I shouldn’t be wondering about something like this, and you may be right, but sometimes, it’s difficult not to. I’ve also been wondering whether another resident could be Shahbaz in disguise. I suppose the best thing is to treat people as being who they claim to be. I’m having to make up my own rules as I go along, as I’ve never been in a situation like this before, and I don’t know anyone else who has.
I have also been wondering whether I should do a little campaigning regarding my other set of problems – i.e. the psychological ones. I kind of feel that, having been through those things, and having a story to tell that could warn other people off of making the same mistakes that I made, that I should speak about it. On the other hand, I also feel that it could distract from the spying issue, and it could make me seem even more mad, which would be unhelpful. Maybe people would get sick of hearing about the spying if that’s all I talk about, and so maybe it would be good to talk about something else. However, maybe it would be a good thing if people do get sick of hearing about the spying. I dunno.